It’s difficult enough to decide on what you want to do. It is difficult enough to get motivated and inspired to start something new, something exciting, something big. Then sooner or later your mind jumps in to dash your hopes.
Here are five tricks it uses to keep you in inaction and make yourself doubt so that you don’t start in the first place.
- You will fear being inauthentic. At some point of time, you will be confronted with the notion that the change you want to make, the project you are about to tackle, the action you want to take is just not “who you are”. But don’t listen to those voices. Don’t be afraid to lose yourself. There is no “you”. You are in a constant flow. Don’t get obsessed about or attached to the status quo. Because it changes. The person you are today is not who you were, and not who you are going to be a few years from now. Be bold, be daring, allow yourself to evolve.
- You will think you are not ready. This will come up at all stages. You will literally hear your mind holding you back by saying “wait until you DO this other thing”, “wait until you ARE better/stronger/faster”, “wait until you HAVE a bit more money”. But there is no such thing as the right time. That’s an illusion. It is all a matter of decision.
- You will be seduced to lose momentum. It will happen that after a big achievement you will feel so good, that you might forget about all other steps that need to come after the first milestone. The mind will trick you into taking a bigger break, celebrate longer than you actually need to. This will stall your performance and you will lose momentum. There is nothing wrong with recovery, in fact growth happens during recovery, but be aware of the “high” feeling after success and get yourself back to moving on to the next challenge.
- You will be held back by wrong assumptions and limiting beliefs. In order to make decisions for the future, we access a database of experience stored in our heads. But we forget to ask ourselves two important questions: (1) How did that information get into the database? (2) What was the context and the circumstances in which that information was relevant and valid? Don’t run your life on outdated information. As the captain of your own ship, you must regularly challenge the database. Clean it up. Update it.
- You will be confronted with too many options. Your mind will show you alternatives and backups. It will remind you of other things you wanted to do. But beware, too many options cause analysis paralysis, they give you a false sense of safety and won’t let you give 100% to your first choice. Limit your options before they limit you. Pick one thing and stick to it.
Watch the video above for the full lesson so that you can continue living as a role model!
Complement with these previous posts:
STOP sabotaging yourself from making big progress!
Why you need to limit your options to succeed!
The main reason why you don’t take action is as simple as it is worrisome!
Are you a perfectionist? Here is a thought to help you overcome it.
Star Trek Wisdom – About fear of death and fear of failure
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VIDEO TRANSCRIPT AND QUOTES:
Hi everybody. It’s Tasso.
It is difficult, I would say impossible, to do something, anything for that matter, if your mind is stepping on the breaks.
How often did you want to do something? How often did you want to accomplish a goal, did you want to change something in your life, did you want to reach out to somebody for advice or maybe mentorship? You had the will, you had the energy, but your mind kept holding you back.
For those of you who have been following me for a while and read and watched my previous posts, you would have realized that helping people break through this point of their mind holding them back, is a passion and mission of mine.
Therefore, I put together these five tips, these five insights, basically, that I wanted to share with you. Five ways in which your mind tricks you into inaction. I hope that it empowers you to step in and change that. Without further due, let’s dive right into this.
Number one: The fear of being inauthentic.
What do I mean by that? Have you ever had the feeling in a particular situation that it was “just not who you are”?
Maybe you wanted to change something, you wanted to put more structure in your life, be more productive, but then you thought, “Yes, but you know, this is limiting me. It’s inhibiting my creative freedom.”
Or you wanted to maybe wake up earlier, or you wanted to exercise more, or you wanted to speak up more, for yourself or within the office environment. Then you thought, “You know what? That’s not who I am. I’m not a morning person. I’m not a gym guy/gal.”
This is how the mind is holding you back. This is what I mean by “fear of being inauthentic”.
Fear of being inauthentic is keeping us in inaction and is keeping us in our comfort zone.
But here’s the thing, here’s the important insight for you: You should not be afraid of losing yourself. Because there is no “you”. You are in a constant flow.
You should not be obsessed about and attached to the status quo (to who you are right now) because it changes. Who you are right now is not who you were, nor who you are going to be in the future, in a few years from now.
You know the saying, “What got you here will not necessarily get you further.” You have to constantly seek to reinvent yourself. You have to be bold and daring. You have to allow yourself to evolve.
Number two: “Once you…”
Have you ever experienced this? That your mind steps in and says, “Yes, okay. But once you DO this then you can do something else. Once you ARE this you can maybe do this and that. Once you HAVE this, referring to resources, you can do this and this and that.”
But you know as well as I do that there is no right moment for anything in life.
There is no right moment to quit your job. There is no right moment to get married. There is no right moment to have kids.
That’s an illusion. Things don’t get better, things just get different. In fact, if you ask your grandparents, they will tell you things get worse. Everything seemed to be better in the past.
We, as humans, like to tag things with “good” or “bad”. Which in fact we shouldn’t be, because we lack the capacity to even imagine the bigger picture of the universe and of life.
In regards to “self”, you don’t need to become anybody else in order to take that first step. In fact, taking that first step will enable you to become the person who can accomplish whatever you are about to accomplish.
Number three: “You deserve a break.”
Now, hear me out on this one. I have had this many, many times and I thought of sharing this with you because I feel this is something that is a more general phenomenon that it might be overlooked.
Have you ever come into the situation where you finished a project, you accomplished something that you are very proud to have gone through? And you felt that you needed to reward yourself with a break because it felt so good. “Okay. I’m going to take the rest of the day off.”
See, there’s nothing wrong with taking a break. In fact, in breaks and through recovery is where growth happens. Absolutely legit to have breaks and to recover.
Also, of course, absolutely fantastic to celebrate your wins. You need to celebrate your wins in order to remember the good things that happened to you.
But you know, your mind tricks you very often into believing that you need more than you actually need. You don’t need to take half a day off. You don’t need to stop doing stuff for the rest of the week just because you’ve accomplished this one thing and it felt so, so good.
Instead, take a break. Pause. Reflect. Celebrate your wins, but then move on. Just move on.
Number four: Assumptions and Beliefs.
What I mean by that is, of course, wrong assumptions and limiting beliefs. How often have you not done something because you made an assumption that kept you from doing this?
I will give you an example. You might have wanted to reach out to somebody at work, maybe some higher ranked person, a senior manager, a leader in the organization. But then you didn’t do this because you assumed they wouldn’t have time. You assumed that they are too high ranked and they would not have any interest in your work or in yourself.
Assumptions and beliefs are the number one killer of all action. It’s not even your mind’s fault.
Here’s what happens, you access a database of experience in order to make a decision for the future, but you forget to ask yourself two important questions.
- Question number one is “how did this information get into the database?” Did you put it in there? Or did somebody else put it in there?
- Question number two is “what was the context, what were the circumstances under which this information was deemed so relevant by your brain to be stored in your database of experiences?”
As I said before, whatever got you here will not necessarily get you any further. Your job as the captain of your own ship is to challenge this database regularly. You have to clean it up. You have to update it.
You cannot operate an old information. Look, you cannot possibly make a business decision on old information. You wouldn’t run new software on Windows 3.1. You have to avoid ending up in, “Oh, I thought…” Because this is going to cause you a lot of regret.
Number five: Too many options.
On the topic of “too many options”, I made a separate blog post that you can happily access.
Today, just a quick reminder, that too many options cause more harm than they do good. Here is why:
First, analysis paralysis. I had mentioned the very famous experiment that was conducted in the US, where people were given various choices of marmalade in a supermarket and those who had more options of marmalade ended up purchasing much less than those who were in front of less options.
Second, options give you a false sense of safety because you have so many backups. “I can become this, I can become an astronaut, I can become a business leader, I can become a doctor”. Too many options give you the feeling that you still could do everything. But honestly, you can’t. You don’t have the resources, you don’t have the time to do everything. You have to pick one thing and go for it.
Third, options do not allow you to give 100% on that one thing that will move you forward. On that one thing that you are meant to do and to become. This is why you have to limit your options before they limit you.
These were the five insights. I hope that you enjoyed this. I hope that it resonated with you. I hope that it gave you some inspiration to see and understand better when sometimes your mind is going in a different direction than the one you would have aimed for yourself.
If you found this inspiring, please like it and share it. Share it so that other people also might experience and understand how their mind is holding them back and they can break through this, by knowing what’s in their way and can start moving forward.
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Until the next post, all the best.